Glorious, madam, isn't it?
Mmmm, yes.
Could I see that one down there, please?
Why, yes, indeed, madam. By all means.
Mr. Meyer. Mr. Meyer!
Mr. Meyer! Mr. Meyer! Mr. Meyer! Mr. Meyer!
Let me out of here! Let me out of here!
What's this?
Some dame cops a bracelet out of Meyer & Company and hocks it on 3rd Avenue.
- Open and shut. - First offense?
Nah, she's got a record. This is her third offense.
Good, good. A first offender at Christmastime is tougher than tiger meat.
Conviction's only 78 percent as against 82 percent last year.
Can I handle this case, boss? I'll getcha a conviction--
Oh, you could probably handle it as well as some of these dopes.
When the right case comes along, I'll give it to you.
Wife beater or something like that.
Your face isn't right to prosecute a woman.
- Awwww... - Get me Sargent!
What's his face got that mine hasn't got?
I don't know. But whatever it is, he hasn't lost a case for me yet.
Yassuh... Yassuh...
Well, if this is de office, he's already lef'.
I didn't say to say that, you dumbbell.
Oh my, no, this isn't his office.
You just tell him that a young woman wants to make an appointment with him.
Uh, uh, this isn't de office. A young woman wants to make a appointment wid ya.
Just a minute.
Uh, who all wants to speak to Master Sargent?
Your boss.
It's a good thing you didn't take up the stage for a living.
I'll see you down here in 15 minutes.
Now, wait a minute. You told me when I finished up the Mathews case, I--
But I got 750 miles to drive.
Your mother sure's gonna be mad.
Oh sure, and fall asleep at the wheel and get croaked.
Well, who's defending?
O'Leary.
Aw, that windbag, huh?
He'll give us the Gettysburg Address and the Declaration of Independence and the--
I'll have Tom meet you in court, and you'll be out of there by noon.
Kindly remember who you're talking to...
...and leave the pigs out of it.
...during the course of this trial to prove that an invaluable bracelet...
...was taken from the premises of Meyer & Company by the defendant.
I don't like the smile on that jury's pan.
All juries get softhearted at Christmas, Tommy. If you ever get a case to prosecute...
...and you see that "peace on earth, good will toward men" look come in their eyes...
...get a continuance.
How flimsy is this argument?
Oh, this is a waste of time, ladies and gentlemen of the jury.
Of your time and mine.
Time we could spend to much better advantage in last-minute Christmas shopping.
I know that's what I'd like to be doing.
May it please the Court, we object, Your Honor.
The jury's Christmas shopping has nothing to do with the case.
Objection sustained.
The jury will disregard Mr. O'Leary's tempting allusion to Christmas shopping.
Quite obviously, we'd all like to be Christmas shopping.
I withdraw the allusion, Your Honor.
When I say there has been a waste of time...
...I mean that the State has gone to great lengths...
...to prove that Anna-Rose Malone, sometimes known as Lee Leander...
Sometimes known as a lot of other things...
...did on the afternoon of December 3rd walk out upon 5th Avenue...
...with a bracelet which was still the property of Meyer & Company...
...to prove something she freely admits.
As if the proof of that fact constituted proof of guilt!
The truth is simple.
The bracelet was removed during a temporary loss of will and consciousness...
...now known as schizophrenia...
...but formerly known as...
...hypnotism!
This young girl...
What do you mean, you're not gonna object?
Shut up. He's just postponed the case till after Christmas.
How'd you figure that?
Hypnotism.
The salesman showed her the bracelet...
...urged her to clasp it on her wrist...
...begged her to examine it under a more powerful light...
...and then he excused himself.
Now, it's an old trick, this tempting of the poor.
They say, 'Take it home and wear it for a few days.'
They say, 'Drive it around this afternoon, bring it back tomorrow.'
'Ha! Buy it all on your own terms!'
Consider the jewel scene between Mephistopheles and Marguerite in "Faust"!
I hope he isn't gonna sing it.
The bracelet is under a powerful light.
The young girl stares at it.
Closer.
The great central stone flashes blindingly in her eyes...
...blue, green, purple, orange!
Suddenly, the colors are gone.
All is darkness.
Well, what is this? Where is the shop?
Where is the light she was under?
What is she doing on 5th Avenue, blocks away from Meyer & Company?
With a thrill of heart, she feels at her wrist, not daring to look.
No doubt about it.
Then, panic!
She turns and hurries towards the great jewelry store.
Will they believe her?
Fear turns her legs to lead.
One block, two blocks.
She goes blindly, moving into strangers who think she must be crazy.
Six blocks. Ah, there at last is the great jewelry store...
...its windows blazing with gems!
But no, the gems are gone...
...the windows almost bare.
With a sinking heart, she tries the lock.
It's closed.
Meyer & Company have closed for the night.
Ain'tcha gonna do somethin'? That jury's sold right now.
Shhh. Wait.
What was she to do?
What would you do, madam?
That's certainly a terrible spot to be in. I-I suppose I...
The counsel will refrain from questioning the jurors...
...and the jurors will refrain from answering.
Never heard of such a thing.
I beg the Court and jury's pardon. I was carried away.
What was she to do?
Suddenly, an inspiration. The telephone book!
S.A. Meyer & Company, S.A. Meyer & Company, S...
S. A. Meyer must live somewhere, but he doesn't seem to.
Maybe it's Long Island!
S.A. Meyer, S.A. Meyer, S-- Ah, here he is!
S.A. Meyer, 324 Woodmere Road, Roslyn, Long Island.
I'll take the first train to Long Island. I'll be there at dinner time.
He'll believe me. He's got to believe me!
He should've been on the stage.
He was.
But it takes money to go to Long Island.
Where will I get the money to go to Long Island and tell Mr. Meyer what happened?
Then, a crazy idea. I'll hock the bracelet to get the money to go to Long Island.
Quick, a hock shop!
Quick, Watson, the needle.
Ah, here we are. A nice, cozy pawnbroker.
A friend of the poor.
May I get some money on this, please?
Well, well, I should say you could, young woman.
Where did you get this piece?
Well, never mind where I got it. I want some money on it quick.
Now, now, now, now, now, take it easy. Everything is going to be all right.
Just step in, please.
A little further.
Bang! Lock that door while I keep her in here!
Ooh, let me out of here!
Oh, you're gonna get it, all right.
Hello, get me the police department.
Hello, I've got the thief what robbed Meyer & Company!
The defense rests.
The hypothesis of hypnotism is a very interesting one.
Let me be the first to admit it.
But, unfortunately, I am no Svengali.
Nor are you, ladies and gentlemen of the jury.
The People of the State of New York will require...
...the expert testimony of Dr. Keinmetz, the psychiatrist.
Who, I am sorry to say, is spending his Christmas vacation in Florida.
Well, uh, what do you want to do about this?
I object, Your Honor!
How can you object to something he has not yet said?
Because I know what he's going to say.
With your kind permission, counsel.
Since the defense counsel has interjected a new element which was not testified to...
...the State asks permission to reopen the case...
...for the purpose of allowing the testimony of Dr. Keinmetz...
...and for the request of a continuance to be granted...
...till after the Christmas holidays when he will be available.
I object.
The defense has summed up, the case is practically closed.
Objection overruled.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury...
...you are again admonished not to converse among yourselves...
...nor with anyone else connected with this trial.
Nor are you to form or express any opinion concerning this case...
...until it is finally submitted to you.
The defendant will remain in custody subject to giving a $5,000 bond.
All jurors, parties and witnesses in this case are instructed to return to the Court...
...Tuesday, January 3rd, at 10 a.m.
Court is adjourned.
And, uh, a very merry Christmas to you all.
That was a dirty trick you played on me. It means another day in court.
I'm not working for the State. I have to earn my money.
No sense of humor.
Merry Christmas, Francis.
Boy, if that wasn't the neatest fake reverse I ever saw...
Yeah, he fell for that one like a horse down a coal hole.
A fine mess you've gotten me into. I thought I was gonna be outta here for Christmas!
- Well, all you gotta do is post a bond. - How can I post a bond?
I haven't any more money, and I don't wanna spend Christmas in jail.
Please don't let them do that.
What do you mean, you haven't got any more money?
What have I been talking for, to hear my own voice?
If you hadn't talked so much, I'd be out of here by now.
- What do you mean by that? - Oh, hypnotism.
That gag's so old, it's got whiskers.
Please don't let them keep me here over Christmas.
Well, what could you do if you were out? You haven't got any money.
- I could walk around, couldn't I? - It ain't gonna be as bad as all that.
- You'll get a nice little room and a nice-- - Yeah, yeah, never mind the build-up.
He thinks he's taking me to the Ritz.
I hope you have a merry Christmas.
On your way out, send Fat Mike in here.
Fat Mike, the bondsman?
If you know any other Fat Mikes, you can send them, too.
I get it.
You don't, but let it pass.
- You wanna see me? - Yeah. You got a match?
A match? Why, sure I got a match. I got a flock of 'em.
I, uh, I, uh... Well, whaddaya know about that?
I could've swore... I remember. I gave 'em to Elmer.
- You know, he come to me and he says-- - Well, never mind.
How much would you charge for 5,000 bail till January 3rd?
- Did they pin somethin' on you, pal? - No, no, it's not for me.
- It's for the young lady who was here today. - Oh.
- How much? - Well, for a friend of yours...
Not a red Samelka.
- I'm not asking any favors. - Favors? Ha! It's a privilege.
- You still live in the same place? - Yeah.
- How soon do you want her out? - Right away.
She's out.
Thanks.
Oh, me...
- Uh, yassuh? - Is the big boss in?
He's in but he ain't home.
Save that for your radio act.
Come on in. Just tell the big boss that she's here, that's all.
With the compliments of Fat Mike. You got that?
Y-Y-Yassuh, Mr. Mike.
Not Mr. Mike. Fat Mike.
Y-Y-Yassuh, Mister F-F-Fat Mi-Mike.
Okay, toots. I'll see ya in court.
W-W-Won't you sit down? Please?
Well, what's the matter now?
- She's here. - Who's here?
- I don't know, sir. - Then how do you know she's here?
- Well, I seed her come in. - You seed who come in?
De lady?
- You mean there's a lady in the apartment? - Yassuh.
What'd you let her in for? I told you I wasn't home to anybody.
I told him dat, but he shoved de door open anyhow...
...and pushed de lady on in wid his compliments.
- Who did? - Uh, Fat Ike?
Fat Ike? You mean Fat Mike?
Yassuh. He sho' ain't no Thin Ike.
- Oh. How do you do? - Hello.
- What are you doing here? - I dunno yet, but I've got a rough idea.
- Well, I'm glad you're out and-- - Now, what do I have to do for it?
Well, for one thing, you might say 'Thank you'...
...but if that doesn't fit in with your plans, just skip it.
- My motives in this matter-- - Scotch and soda?
Thanks.
One of these days one of you boys is going to start one of these scenes differently...
... and one of us girls is going to drop dead from surprise.
No doubt. Now, if you'll tell me--
I, uh... I suppose you do this with all the lady prisoners?
Oh my, yes. My life is just one long round of whoopee.
You're in a good spot for it.
Wonderful. I merely have to raise my finger and my slightest whim is satisfied.
- Now, if you'll-- - And I suppose if anybody says no...
- ...you just put 'em right back in the cooler. - That's right.
Look. When court reconvenes I'll try my best to put you in jail for a good long time.
That's my business. But you haven't been convicted yet...
...so I don't see why you shouldn't enjoy Christmas like the rest of us.
- That's why I had Mike get you out. - And bring me up here.
- I did not ask him to bring you up here. - Then why did that gorilla bring me up here?
- Because he's got a mind like a sewer. - Thanks.
Now, look. I'm very glad to have been of service to you, but now if you'll--
You mean I don't have to stay here if I don't want to?
You most certainly do not.
Then I'll stay.
- But I won't be forced. - Hey, now wait a minute...
You know, there's nothing as dangerous as a square shooter.
If all men were like you, there wouldn't be any nice girls left.
Yeah. Well, all this is leading into a very interesting and deep-dish discussion...
...which I haven't time to pursue at the moment.
I'm leaving on a little trip and as it's quite a drive and I haven't had my dinner yet, I--
- Oh. You mean you want me to go. - Well, yes.
- Where? - Where, what?
Well, after all, I was on my way to a nice, comfortable jail...
...with three meals a day and turkey for Christmas. And now I--
- Don't you live someplace? - Nh-nh.
Well, where have you been living? In a tree or something?
Oh, I had a room in a hotel, but they locked me out.
Ah. And how much do you owe at the hotel?
Um, a hundred and twenty- six dollars and forty cents.
Oh. Well, that doesn't solve any problems, does it?
Well, why don't you just put me back in the clink? That'll solve a lot of problems.
I'm not sure that I can, and-- Well, that wasn't the idea.
- Have you had dinner? - Not yet.
Well, come on, I'll buy you that Christmas dinner I cheated you out of...
...and maybe we can figure out something. Rufus, get my coat, will ya?
Yassuh, Mr. Sargent.
I'm just spreadin' y'all a few sandwiches, in case you get hungry in de middle of de ride.
You really didn't want me to come up here at all, then?
I'm sorry to say I did not.
Hot dawg! But don't forget you gotta go see your maw.
Of course, I could lend you my apartment while I'm away.
- That sounds like a play, doesn't it? - Yeah. Sounds like a flop. No, thanks.
Oh, don't worry about me. I can always chisel a hotel for a week or so.
That's a nice, cheesy idea.
Well, I'm not going to sleep in the subway. And as far as the holiday is concerned...
...I guess I'll get plenty of that when you get through with me.
Oh, uh, not that I mean it in a disagreeable way, you understand?
- I understand. - Your business is your business.
Of course, some people wouldn't care for that kind of business...
...but, uh, somebody has to do the dirty work.
It's just too bad it had to be somebody as nice as you.
- How long have you been swiping things? - Always.
- Did you ever get caught before? - Mh-hm.
- Did you take things you didn't need? - Sure.
In the presence of beautiful things, did you have the sudden irresistible urge...
...to take them in your hands and hurry away with them?
You mean, was I hypnotized?
- No, no, I mean, maybe you're a kleptomaniac. - Oh, no. No. They tried that, though.
No. You see, to be a kleptomaniac, you can't sell any of the stuff afterwards...
...or you'll lose your amateur standing.
You know, I can't understand it.
First you think it's heredity and...
...then you get some guy with several generations of clergymen behind them.
I don't think you ever could understand because your mind is different.
Right or wrong is the same for everybody, you see...
...but the rights and the wrongs aren't the same.
- Like, in China, they eat dogs. - That's a lot of piffle.
- They do eat dogs! - No, no, I mean your theory.
Oh. Well, um--
Try it like this.
- Supposing you were starving to death... - Mh-hm.
...and you didn't have any food and you didn't have any money...
...and you didn't have any place to get anything...
...and there were some loaves of bread out in front of a market.
Now, remember, you're starving to death. And the man's back was turned.
Would you swipe one?
You bet I would.
That's because you're honest.
You see, I'd have a six-course dinner at the table d'hôte across the street...
...and then say I'd forgotten my purse. Get the difference?
Yeah. Your way's smarter.
That's it. We're smart.
- Hello, Jack. How are you? - Oh. Good evening.
I want you to meet my wife. My dear, this is John Sargent and, uh--
- Oh, how do you do? - How do you do? This is Miss Huh-huh.
I'm so sorry. I didn't catch the name.
- Well, I'm-- - I'm so sorry, Jack, we must hurry...
I never thought of that.
Gee, you're sweet. You never think of anything wrong, do you?
Now, let's have a nightcap, and then I gotta get going.
A couple of B&Bs, and will you have the band play "My Indiana Home"?
Yes, sir.
Here's that turkey dinner I owe you, and a room, and a couple of breakfasts.
Thanks. Thanks a lot.
You wouldn't wanna dance with me again, would you?
Isn't that asking for trouble?
I mean I might step on your feet again.
A couple of more crunches aren't going to hurt them at this stage.
- Why did you have them play this piece? - Cause that's where I'm going.
- No! Are you a Hoosier? - Sure. Wabash, Indiana.
- That is, a farm just outside of Wabash. - Wabash, Indiana? No wonder I liked you.
- I'm from Eltonville. - No!
- Why, that's only about 50 miles from Wabash. - Yes, sir.
Well, I'll be darned. Think we had to come here and meet like this.
- I go home every Christmas. - You do?
My mother still runs the farm. She does all right, too.
- Raises Partridge Wyandottes, Poland Chinas-- - Oh, we never had anything that swell.
We didn't either until just lately.
How long since you've been home?
Never.
Why?
I ran away.
I don't know what the circumstances were, of course.
Not so hot.
Well, time takes care of those things.
Your folks write to you?
I had a letter from my mother when my father died.
Your mother's alive, then?
I hope so.
Say, uh, how would you like to go home for Christmas?
I can drop you off on the way and pick you up on the way back.
Oh, gee.
Ah, they were working here last year when I came through.
It says, to the right.
There it is, over that way!
Blairs Mills.
- Blairs Mills... Uh-huh. - Blairs Mills?
- Blairs Mills... Blairs Mills... - Bethlehem... Beallsville...
- Blairsville? - No, that's not it.
- All right, C5. - Blairs Mills, here it is.
- It's in Pennsylvania. - Are we supposed to go through there?
Well, it's very close to where we're supposed to go through.
That's what I was afraid of. We better bear north a little.
- About, uh... half as far as my thumbnail. - You let me know when we've gone that far.
- Where is north? - Up this way.
- No, no, I mean from where we are. - That way.
Why?
Well, we've been going that way, so naturally, it--
- That way. - Are you sure?
No.
Looks a little steep. What do you think?
That way.
- Which way do you wanna try now? - One looks as bad as the other.
Maybe we better just give the whole thing up, huh?
Look out, there's an elephant!
- What the--!?
Why, it's a thrashing machine! I haven't seen one for years.
- We're not getting very far, are we? - Well, we're holding our own.
Hey, maybe we ought to take a snooze and then try it again, huh?
Oh yes, I think that would be a lovely idea.
- I could eat the hind leg off a cow. - And I could eat the horns.
Rufus!
He's not very bright but he can cook.
Now, is this better than jail, or isn't it?
I'd almost forgotten I was going to be in jail.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way. The whole purpose of the trip was to forget it.
Thank you.
Chicken, coleslaw, dill pickle, ham, Swiss cheese... Something else I can't identify.
- That's the wax paper. - Not bad, either.
- I hope my mother will be glad to see me. - Of course she'll be glad to see you.
Yeah, I guess she will, all right.
- Ooh! - What's the matter?
- Oooh, look who's here. - Oh!
Well, good morning, Bossy.
Oh, we're surrounded.
Say, how would you like some nice milk for breakfast?
- Would you still know how? - Would I!
When I took up the law, Indiana lost its finest milker in seven counties.
- You just watch me. - What are you gonna put it in?
Well, there...
...doesn't seem to be much choice now.
- Um, I can hold it. - Oh, thanks.
Bossy, you stay that way. I'll get around.
Yeah. That's pretty cute.
Um, you stay there, breakfast.
Say, what can I use for a stool? I always used to have a stool.
Oh yeah, I'll tell you. You hold this, and I'll go and sit on the running board.
Get her tail around. Come on, Bosbo... over, Boss... over, Boss...
- Does she like to have her ears tickled? - Yeah, I think so.
- Gimme the bottle. - Don't you want me to hold it?
No, no. I'll hold it between my knees. That's how I used to do it.
- Come on, get her around a little more. - I'll try.
Come on over, Boss... come on... come on... over...
- She doesn't seem to wanna go. - Maybe I can do without sitting.
Now come on, Boss. All we want is about a pint.
- How's it coming? - Oh, fi--
- What did you say? - She wants to be coaxed.
Hold still, Boss.
Oh there, that's fine.
Ugh.
What did you say?
- Are you getting any milk? - Yeah, it's coming... fine.
Hey, don't let her move. Push her back.
- I'm pushing as hard as I can. - No, no, don't. Pull her back that way.
- Is that far enough? - Yes, that's far enough.
Oh, you spilled the breakfast.
What'd you do that for? Now we'll have to start all over again.
- Well, you pushed her around. - Well--
- Look at your hat! - What's the matter?
Oh...
Oh, that's not funny. That's the only hat I've got that matches this dress.
Good morning.
What are you doing on my property?
Oh, we didn't know this was your property. See, we got on a detour--
It's posted clear enough, ain't it? Signed every hundred feet.
Can't you read?
Oh, you see, we happen to have got here in the middle of the night--
- Yes, I noticed. You busted down my fence. - Oh, I'll be glad to pay for it.
You'll pay for it all right.
Huh. You New Yorkers think you can trespass on people's property...
...break down their fences, fool around with their cattle...
...spend the night in their fields with I don't know what kind of a--
Listen, you fresh hick--
- Save your language for the judge. - Who's going to arrest us?
- You're under arrest now. - Where's your warrant or badge of office?
Don't get cute. I'm a citizen of the United States, and you're under arrest.
And if you think you ain't, just try to get away.
- Can he do that? - Unfortunately, he can.
- What'll we do? Walk? - We'll ride. Open that rumble seat.
Open it yourself.
May I have your handkerchief, please?
Thank you.
- Right here! - Don't give your right name.
- That's a good idea. Don't give yours, either. - I never do.
- Did I get them cakes all right this morning? - Fine.
- Looks like business, Clyde. - Huh?
Well, I declare! If that ain't a shotgun wedding...
No, that's Hank. He's probably got a couple of trespassers.
With that new detour, he gets 'em all the time.
Well, it's a pity he couldn't wait till a body's had his breakfast.
I wanna see the Judge of the Peace.
Go on!
Kinda early, ain'tcha?
Good morning, Your Honor.
There seems to have been a little misunderstanding here all around.
This, um... gentleman here found my car in his field...
...and, naturally, he came to the conclusion that--
What's the charge, Hank?
Trespassing on posted property, wanton destruction of a fence, and petty larceny.
- No, that's not-- - What'd they steal?
They was milkin' one of my cows when I caught 'em.
- Oh, only a little thermos bottle, that big. - Nobody asked you anything, young woman.
When it comes your turn, you can talk all you like.
- What's your name? - Mary Smith.
Mary... Smith.
- Where do you live? - Roaring Falls, Ohio.
Roaring... Falls... Ohio.
- Occupation? - Bubble dancer.
Huh?
Bubble dancer. You know...!?
Whatever that is.
Bubble... dancer.
All right.
- What's your name? - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
New York, New York.
Henry... Wadsworth... Longfellow... New York.
- Occupation? - Steamfitter.
Steam...fitter.
All right. You plead guilty or not guilty?
May it please Your Honor, I'm somewhat familiar with the legal procedure...
- ...having at one time contemplated the law. - Then you shouldn't have broken the law.
- It was an ignorance of the fact, Your Honor. - Ignorance is no excuse.
I'm aware of that, and I'm also aware of what a plea of 'not guilty' means...
...when made by non-residents of the state.
Ain't even married.
I don't know what you mean by 'even married'.
You say 'even married' as though married was the least people could be.
Some minor unimportant arrangement.
I appeal to your sense of chivalry, Your Honor. I take it you're a married man...
...and that the charming lady who opened the door was your, uh--
Spent the night in my field. From out of the state.
My learned opponent here, I-I mean that bug with a shotgun...
...is trying to inject into this case an element of--
You plead guilty or not guilty?
- To what? - It must be all kind of funny to you--
To trespass, destruction of private property, and petty larceny.
- What'll you settle for? - What will I settle for?
Did you ever hear of contempt of court while you were studying the law?
I think I'll just remand you to the constable and send you over to the county seat.
- Now w-wait a minute, Your-- - Wait, nothin'.
I was tryin' to give you a fair trial, but when men drive girls over the state line...
...as you did, the matter's worth investigatin'.
Also when they give funny names like Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
You may think you're dealin' with rubes, and I'm gonna give you the opportunity--
- Get some water! The house is on fire! - Water! Water! Water!
It's only a waste bin. Come on!
How the ding-dang that ever caught on fire?
- Now, where'd they go? - Huh?
Well, I'll be god-darned!
Hey!
Hank, you'll break my window! Don't do it! Hank, you'll break the windows!
You loon! There's the fire!
Well, that's that. On the way back I suppose I'll have to duck around through Canada.
I guess that would be better.
Must feel kinda funny to you to be a fugitive from justice.
Mh-hm. Very funny. You know, all the way across Pennsylvania...
...I've been trying to figure out how that fire got started. Nobody was smoking.
I was.
You were?
Did you throw anything in that basket?
Nothing but a match.
Um, a lighted match?
Oh, I guess there must've been some life in it.
Did you throw it in there on purpose?
Well, I wasn't aiming for the spittoon.
I suppose you know that's called arson.
No!
I thought that was when you bit somebody!
'Bit somebody'...
Well, it's better than going to jail, isn't it?
I told you my mind worked differently.
Do you realize that house is probably in flames a mile high?
Hope it is.
So do I, but what's that got to do with the morals of the case?
What have morals got to do with it?
You treated me like your sister.
Here we are.
Oh.
Hasn't changed much.
- A new drugstore. - Yeah, they creep in overnight.
That's where I went to my first dance.
- I went to my first dance in the firehouse. - Oh, I've been to the firehouse, too.
- Do I keep on going straight ahead? - No, you turn left at the next corner.
It's about a mile, the other side of the tracks.
- I'm getting scared. - Now, now.
Oh, please, let's wait till-- She might not even live here anymore.
Now don't be nervous, for heaven's sake.
- Will you go in with me? - Sure I'll go in with you. Come on.
- See that tree? - Mh-hm.
I fell out of it when I was twelve. From that branch right there.
I was a terrible tomboy. If I had been a man, I would have run away to sea.
I landed on my head.
Yeah? That's a better gag than hypnotism! Why didn't your lawyer use that?
- I don't know. - You should've had me for your lawyer.
Well. Here we are.
Come on, now. Smile.
Oh, I didn't mean to knock so loud.
That sounds like Mickey.
Don't suppose it is, though. He'd be almo--
- Shut up! - Somebody's coming.
Gee, you've been sweet.
Yes?
Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Doesn't Mrs. Malone live here anymore?
I guess you mean my wife.
Mama! Somebody out there wants to see ya.
Merry Christmas, mama.
Come in.
- Um, this is Mr.-- - Sargent. How do you do?
Sit down.
You're looking fine, mama.
What'd you come here for? What do you want?
I don't want anything, mama. It was just Christmas, and Mr. Sargent happened to be--
You see, I live just outside of Wabash, and I knew you'd be glad--
- So he brought me with him. - Glad? Why should I be glad?
Good riddance to bad rubbish, I said the day she left.
- Oh, please, mama. Mr. Sargent-- - Just like her father, she is.
Always laughin' at serious things, she was. Never doin' what she was told...
...till she winds up stealin' as I always said she would.
Stealin' my mission money that I'd put by with the sweat of my brow.
I didn't steal it.
I've told you a thousand times I only borrowed it.
I was going to pay you back out of what I'd earn!
But you didn't pay me back, did you? You never paid me back!
And you never paid anybody else back!
How could I after you called me a thief in front of the whole town?
Do you think anybody let me work for them after that?
We weren't good enough for you. A decent home and a hard-working mother...
...with a crook for a daughter.
I don't wanna rush you, but we've still got 50 miles to go.
Don't you think we'd better be on our way?
Thanks.
Bye, mama.
It's been very interesting meeting you, Mrs.--
The name doesn't concern you.
It certainly does not.
Come on, now. It isn't as bad as that.
I'd forgotten how much that woman hates me.
And how much I hate her.
That's a terrible thing to say, isn't it?
Ever since I was little, she was always so right and I was always so wrong.
She was always so good and I was always so bad. She--
Thank you for getting me out.
I'll stay anywhere, only not here! Not so close to her!
Hey...
I should have broken my neck when I fell out of that tree.
It's a little late to think about that now, isn't it?
- You won't make me stay in Eltonville? - No, I won't.
- You'll find me a room someplace else? - I will.
Oh, any old dump will do.
That's just what you're going to get.
It's only got one window, and the mattress is stuffed with rocks, and...
...there's a painting of the cross-eyedest old guy you ever saw in your life.
- How do you know? - How do I know what?
That my grandfather was cross-eyed?
You mean you're--
You're taking me home with you?
Sure, why not?
Oh!
Hey, now what?
Where you want that fire laid, Mrs. Sargent?
Land sakes, Willie, there is only one fireplace on the second floor.
- Haven't you made that fire yet? - No. They had me peelin' potatoes.
Emmy? I think those cookies are burning!
Oh, land sakes!
Lucy Sargent, those cookies are not burning!
I declare it's enough to drive a body crazy the way you carry on when Jack comes home.
I've never burnt anything as is--
Huh, there...
Shall I light the fire now, Mrs. Sargent, or wait till he gets here?
- Well, does the room seem chilly, Willie? - No, it don't seem chilly, Willie...
... chilly... to me, but...
...and the way everybody around this place has been runnin' me ragged all day long...
- ...I doubt if I'd be chilly even in an-- - Ice pond.
Thank you, ma'am.
Now, see here, Willie Simms, if you don't stop complaining, I declare I'll--
Well, I don't know what I'll do.
Here you are, getting a lovely home with nothing...
- ...but a few cows and chickens to feed... - And pigs.
- Oh, what are a few pigs? - And mules.
Well, they don't need any care, and instead of being grateful--
- And the bull. - All right, the bull. But even though...
- Rabbits. - Rabbits.
And ducks.
- There! There he is. - And goats.
Emmy! He's here! Willie, go down and open the door.
And don't forget the fire. Bring in his bags.
Here. Give me the matches, and I'll light the fire myself.
The matches! The matches!
The bags.
- Oh, gosh, oh! - Hemlock!
- Here he is. - Emmy, hurry up! Come on!
Oh boy, he's got a new car!
He's got a new car!
Jack!
I could hardly wait.
- Oh, I'm so glad you're here! - How are you, mother?
Hello, Aunt Emmy!
I declare I'm glad you're here.
If only to keep your mother from taking leave of her senses.
- For the last week this house has been-- - Oh, gosh!
Hiya, Willie. The girls still chasin' ya?
Why are you late? We expected you at six. You didn't have an accident, did you?
- Well, no. You see-- - Who's that?
Mother, Aunt Emma, Willie...
This is Miss Lee Leander who's come to spend Christmas with us.
Hello. I hope I won't be too much trouble.
Trouble? Why, bless you, child, it's a joy to have you here.
You might have sent a telegram, John Sargent.
Grandpa's room hasn't been cleaned since your aunt Clara was here for canning!
Why, Lucy Sargent, that's not so! I had Willie in there just last week.
- Oh, gosh! - It's as clean as a whistle.
Well, I doubt it. Come along, my dear.
You must be freezing and here we are standing like a couple of old hens.
- Did you forget the cookies in the oven? - Oh, merciful heaven!
Be careful, Emmy!
Come on, dear.
- Oh boy. - What?
Ain't she a peacherino?
- All I can say is... Hot dog! - Here, take this.
Now, I may be wrong, but my aunt Emma is probably the second best cook in the world.
Oh, how you talk, Jack.
Who's the first best?
There. That room is still far from clean, Lee, but it's passable.
- Well, it was pretty passable before. - Well, it's perfect now.
Oh, why did she make you do that? Why, Willie could have done them so easily.
- Oh, Willie. Sure, Willie. - Well, I liked doing them.
I've lived in hotels and--
Um... places so long I haven't been around a house as much as I'd like to.
- Your folks dead? - Willie!
My father's dead, my mother's remarried.
Oh, I always say that's so hard on the children.
No matter how nice the new parent is, it just isn't the same.
I don't think it actually makes the slightest difference.
- Annie! - Well, I don't.
Well, come on, everybody.
Let's all go to the parlor now, and we'll listen to Jack play the piano.
I took 14 dollars' worth of piano lessons once, and they've never forgotten it.
- I can sing. - Here you are.
And don't eat it all, we're gonna string it for the Christmas tree.
- Lee, dear, you sit over here. - Uh-huh.
- And, uh, Emmy? - Hm?
- You sit over here. - All right.
Oh, gimme the matches, Willie.
Till you've heard this, you've heard nothing.
He really plays very well...
...when you consider the size of his hands.
Bring the popcorn, Willie.
Play "Swanee River", Jack.
- "Swanee River"? - And sing it.
All ready?
Cute, too, huh?
That's that.
- Oh, play one more piece now, Jack. - Oh, get out of there.
- No, sir. Not till next year. - Please, do. Just... just one more.
I don't know any more.
Oh, yes, you know, the Christmas carol that I like so much? Now--
Ma, we got a guest!
Well, she'd like to hear it, too, wouldn't you, Lee?
I can play a piece. I used to play in the 10-cent store.
- Well, that'd be nice. - I can sing "The End of a Perfect Day".
- Willie! - Well, I can.
- Well, so can everybody else. - Come on, Willie, sing.
All right.
Land sakes, child. You wanna catch pneumonia?
There.
And I think you better have a hot water bottle, too.
- You look a little peaked. - Oh, I'm as strong as a horse.
Well, many a horse has frizz in this weather.
- Mother? - Yes, dear?
I don't know whether I should tell you this or not...
...but I don't like to bring somebody under your roof...
...without you knowing exactly who she is.
- Oh, I think I can guess. - What?
Oh, no, not at all. She isn't even a friend of mine.
Why, I think she's charming. She reminds me of your father's cousin, Winifred...
...who died when her second was born. She was a sweet, lovely thing.
- I was just telling your aunt Emmy-- - Yes, she is charming, mother, but...
...unfortunately, she's a crook.
When I get back to New York, I'm gonna try to put her in jail.
But in the meantime, she didn't have any place to spend Christmas, so--
Oh, the poor lamb.
John Sa-- Why, you'll do no such thing.
That girl's as honest as all outdoors. Why, I can tell by just looking at her face.
If she did take anything, I'm sure it was entirely by mistake.
She's... Well, she's probably a...
...hypochondriac.
She might be at that.
She didn't really take anything. You're just making a bad joke, aren't you?
No, mother. I'm afraid it's not even her first offense.
But that doesn't mean that she wasn't unhappy, and lonely...
...and a human being like the rest of us.
Oh, the poor thing.
She probably didn't get enough love as a child.
Do you remember how ba-- Well, you weren't really bad but...
Do you remember when you took my egg-money I was gonna buy a new dress with?
And then how how hard you worked to pay it back when you did understand?
You made me understand.
No, dear. It was love that made you understand.
I hope she's going to enjoy her stay here with us.
We want to make her happy and comfortable...
Oh, Jack!
Why, I haven't even started that bottle you gave me last Christmas.
Oh, Hour of Ecstasy! That's the same kind you gave her last Christmas!
It is? They told me that was the latest.
Oh, I love it.
- Oh, isn't that pretty? - That's the latest, too, Aunt Emmy.
Why, Jack Sargent, you oughta be ashamed of yourself!
Willie? Here's something else.
Whoa! Oh boy.
Gee, I love Christmas!
Oh.
That's the latest, Willie.
Ah, you got it on backwards.
- No, no, Willie, this way. - That's right.
But you got to yodel with it.
I'll practice up on that language.
Oh boy, that's snazzy! Find a mirror...
- Jack from Mother, huh? - Yes.
- Something to wear? - You wait and see.
A sweater, huh?
Did you knit it yourself?
Oh, thanks, mother, that's swell.
- Do you like the color? - Sure.
- Well, I hope it fits. - Oh, it'll fit.
- Jack from Aunt Emma. - Mh-hm.
Let's see...
Well, socks, huh?
Not so fancy but they keep your feet warm.
Think they'll fit?
- I don't know. - Thanks, Aunt Emmy.
I'm pretty lucky, huh?
You bet.
I'm sorry about the present situation, but--
Uh, there's some other packages over there. See who they're for.
Lee...
Seems you can always depend on Santa Claus.
- Merry Christmas. - Oh, no.
You shouldn't have gone to all this trouble.
Come on, open them up right now.
Oh.
Oh, thank you.
It's so pretty.
Oh, it's really nothing at all.
Just made from some scraps and things that I've accumulated through the years.
Well, it's lovely.
- Oh... Aunt Emma? - Uh-huh.
Not so fancy, but they're grand on a cold night...
...for a spinster lady.
Oh, that's awfully sweet of you.
- Who's that from, Willie? - No.
Oh, why, you dunce. Can't you remember anything?
Oh.
Oh, Hour of Ecstasy.
Yeah, that's the latest.
Mmmmm.
Oh, thank you.
You're all much too kind.
I've never met anyone so thoughtful, so--
Oh, why, my dear, it's nothing at all.
We're so happy to have you here and we're so anxious for you to enjoy your stay.
There really isn't very much for you to do...
...so you'll just have to make the best of it.
Tonight, a few friends are coming and we're gonna bob for apples, and then...
...tomorrow, the young people are gonna have a treasure hunt in the snow...
... and the next day we have a taffy pull.
And will that gum up the house.
Oh, shush. Won't amount to a row of pins.
And the day after that, we have the rummage sale...
...and the charity buffet in the church.
A pretty girl like you oughta be a big help.
Why, the men are so tight, we almost have to pick their pock--
Well, I'll--
I'll do my best.
My specialty is short-changing them.
Emmy!
And then we rest up for a day.
And the day after that is New Year's Eve.
This year, we're gonna have an old-fashioned barn dance...
...like the hicks we're supposed to be.
And that's all there is. Farmers' wives don't die of boredom anymore...
...they die of heart failure!
Do you suppose they popped?
I'm positive they popped.
I wish I could be that sure.
You will be when I've told you the secret, but you must never let it out of the family.
You see, you--
- No! Are you sure? - Yes. Look for yourself.
Oh!
Good morning.
- Good morning. - How's about some breakfast?
Holy smoke, popovers.
- And she made them entirely by herself. - She did?
Well, bring 'em in.
What did you tell him that for?
Oh, don't you know the shortcut to a man's heart is through his gizzard?
Here, take them in while they're hot.
There you are.
Go on! Hurry up.
Say, I didn't know you could cook.
Oh, I didn't make these, she just said I did.
Ah. Why'd she say that?
Because she's taught me how, but I--
Well, I guess she thought if you thought I knew how...
...that would make everything go faster.
Make what go faster?
You see, she thinks you brought me out here because you're in love with me.
Ah.
- Funny, isn't it? - Yeah.
Well, if you think I couldn't make a popover as good as that, you're nuts!
Oh, Judge, would you buy something at my table?
- I'll be back in just a minute. - Oh, please.
- Now, now, just a minute, I'll be back. - Judge, you must buy this beautiful...
I'll be back in just a minute. Just a minute, I'll be back.
- Judge, how about a nice picture frame? - I'm lookin' for my hat. A silk hat.
My wife sent it down here.
Richest, tightest man in town. Come on, Emmy.
- Oh, Judge. Aunt Emma. - Yes?
Mark down one armadillo basket, the $7 size.
- Now, just a minute. - Oh, that's all right.
- I'll tell you what you do. - My dear miss--
We'll let you have it for $6, and you can kiss Aunt Emma in the bargain.
Kiss Aunt Emma? Why, why, why, this is outrageous!
- Four dollars change. - Why, I-I--
- Oh, you'll love it. - You'll love it.
- Three dollars change. - Why, thi-- I protest again--
- Why, thi-- This is outrageous! - Take it easy, Judge. It'll be all right.
- Thank you very much. - Now, really, Mrs. Sargent.
I think that this joke has got-- John Sargent!
Nobody's trying to force you to buy anything, Judge. We just have to keep the odds--
John, I protest against it! Now, John, I protest!
Wearin' pants to a dance! Huh!
You'll never land him that way.
Women belong in skirts.
It's the mystery that gets 'em.
Oh, I just thought these would be easier to wear.
How big are you around the waist?
Oh, I don't know. 25, 26, I guess.
Ha! When I was young, we thought 19 was big.
Ni--? How could anybody be 19?
Well...
It takes a little pulling, but it can be done.
Now let out your breath.
More. Come on!
Now...
One.
Two.
Three.
Now, how does that feel?
Oh, you'll get used to it. The rest of us did.
Dingle sticks.
Now...
Tie that around your waist.
I never did have as much much front as we were supposed to have in my day.
You didn't really wear all these things, did you?
Of course we did. It's just the beginning.
Oh.
Now, here's the corset cover.
Ain't passin' that up.
Here you go.
Oh...
Oh, it's beautiful.
Oh. Was that...
...your wedding dress?
I twiddled around with the idea one summer.
I was all right again by fall.
Thank you, dear.
Lee! Aunt Emma!
Coming.
Land of the living! The dance is not gonna run away before we get there.
Well, I just didn't want Lee to miss the--
Gosh.
- She's beautiful, isn't she? - Yes.
They'd have awfully cute babies.
Why, Emmy. Jack isn't in love. Where'd you get such an idea?
- Fiddlesticks. - I tell you, they're not.
I'm not gonna tell you why or...
...or anything, but they-- Well, they just can't be, that's all.
Emmy, you don't know about these things and--
Mrs. Sargent! If you're referring to the fact that I never married...
...I'd like to point out that you don't have to be a horse...
...to judge a horse show.
If ever I saw two people that were in love...
Almost over.
Gone quickly, hasn't it?
So quickly.
- If that isn't as plain as Pike's Peak. - Oh, fiddlesticks.
You've all been so sweet.
No matter what happens after we get back...
...it won't matter so much.
I'll have some wonderful memories.
Ladies and gentlemen!
I now have the honor...
...to wish you...
...a Happy New Year!
Good night, children. Sweet dreams. I'll have your breakfast at 7.15.
What do you want? Flannel cakes or fried mush?
Oh, I think we'd ride better on the mush.
All right. Happy New Year.
- Good night, Emmy. - Night, Lee.
- Night. - Good night, Aunt Emmy.
Good night, dear.
- Get a good rest. - Good night.
Thank you. Thank you for everything.
- Good night, Jack. - Good night, Lee.
- Good night, son. - Good night, mother.
The best of everything to you this new year.
Thanks, mother.
- Good night. - Good night, dear.
- You sleepy? - Not very.
You wanna come in my room and have a cigarette?
Be nice by the fire.
Well...
I'll be there in a minute.
Come in.
I'm sorry to disturb you, dear, but I know how rushed you'll be tomorrow morning.
- Oh, you're not disturbing me. - Thank you.
First, I wanted to tell you how glad we are to have had you here with us.
And how much I hope you've enjoyed your stay with us.
You'll never know how much.
And then I want to tell you how sorry I am that you're in trouble...
...and how much I hope everything will come out all right.
I didn't know you knew about that.
You poor child.
I never would have mentioned it to you now, only--
Well...
Did Jack ever tell you anything about his childhood?
No, why?
We were very poor after my husband died. In fact, we had nothing.
Jack had to do chores before school and chores after school and...
...and when he was in high school, he drove a delivery truck afternoons...
...to earn a little money.
Then, after chores, he studied evenings to try to get into college.
He worked his way through college, and he worked his way through law school.
Oh, I'm not trying to say that there's anything unusual in that.
Thousands of boys are doing the same thing this minute.
But I am trying to tell you how hard he worked to get where he is today.
How very, very hard.
And I don't think that we should allow anything to spoil it for him now.
I don't think why anything should spoil it for him. Do you?
He's in love with you.
Oh, he isn't in love with me.
He's never had any more interest in me than some...
...some panhandler you buy a meal for.
- Are you sure? - Of course I'm sure.
But he kissed you tonight.
Well, I--
I'm not exactly ugly.
Oh, he... he may have a little fever for me, but...
...it isn't going any further and...
...it hasn't been anyplace, either.
He's no fool.
And even if he was, I--
I wouldn't hurt him, or you...
...Aunt Emmy, or..
...even Willie.
Thank you, dear.
You do love him, though. Don't you?
I'm afraid so.
Here's some of the cookies you made. Don't forget how you made 'em.
Goodbye, mummy.
- Goodbye, Aunt Emmy. - Goodbye.
- Goodbye, Emmy. - Goodbye, Willie.
- Oh, goodbye.
Goodbye and...
...thank you for everything.
I'll never forget it.
Oh, you're quite welcome, dear, and come back whenever you can.
Now wrap up and keep good and warm.
Drive carefully, son. Are you going by way of Scranton or Pittsburgh?
- Through Canada! - Oh!
- Goodbye! - Goodbye!
Hey! Don't forget to write!
Don't you forget to chop some wood. Now, Christmas is over.
Ain't it the truth...
- Have you anything to declare? - No.
Oh, I got four Chinese and a barrel of Cooley on the rumble seat, but that's all.
- Where are you from? - United States.
- Where were you born? - Indiana.
- Where are you from? - The United States.
- Where were you born? - Indiana.
And what is your reason for going through Canada?
I'm a fugitive from justice.
You sound like a fugitive from a nuthouse.
- Go ahead, sir. Go ahead. - Thank you.
- You know something? - What?
You're in Canada now.
What about it?
If you didn't wanna go back tomorrow, I couldn't make ya.
Did you hear what I said?
I heard you.
Why didn't you come in for that cigarette last night?
Oh, I... didn't feel like smoking.
I hope you don't bust out laughin' when you look at me in court.
I won't feel much like laughing.
You know, it's funny that of all the people in the courtroom...
...you were the only one that seemed to have a heart.
- You'd think you'd be the last one. - Don't give me any credit.
Played a fairly dirty trick on you and I felt a little bad about it, that's all.
How did you play me a dirty trick?
By having your case put over till after the holidays...
...when I saw the jury was gonna acquit you for Christmas.
Why, you dog!
Huh!
- That was pretty smart of you, all right. - Part of the business.
Then when that fat slob got me out, it was because your conscience was bothering you?
A little.
And all the time I thought it was my legs.
I didn't even know you were against me.
Oh, I-I knew you were supposed to be tryin' to put me in jail or something...
...but I don't know, you... you seemed so gentle.
That's part of the technique.
If you don't treat a woman with kid gloves...
...every man on the jury wants to punch you in the nose.
You have to handle them with kid gloves, too, or you'll get it right in the verdict.
It's very hard to put a woman in jail, no matter what she's done.
I'm supposed to be sort of a specialist at it.
- No, you're not. - Sure I am.
You're just trying to make me hate you...
...so you won't feel so bad when you give me the business, aren't you?
You are, aren't you?
I mean it.
- I wish you'd stop talking nonsense. - It isn't nonsense.
I'm not a policeman. It's none of my business whether you go back or not.
- Anyway, I haven't any money. - You wouldn't have to worry about that.
Haw-haw!
I can just see the fizz on your fat friend if he had to shell out that five grand.
- You don't have to worry about that, either. - I can worry about it if I want to.
A fine district attorney you are!
You know I love you, don't you?
- Don't say that. - Why shouldn't I say it?
Because some chiseling jeweler claims you swiped one of his bracelets?
I did swipe it.
The jury will tell you whether you took it or not.
He got it back, didn't he?
Anyway, what you did yesterday and what you do today are two different things.
All the State wants you to do is lay off other people's property.
Doesn't care how that condition is arrived at.
Once you were with me, you wouldn't pull any of that stuff.
- I might. - I'd get your ears knocked down.
Please!
You love me, don't you, Lee?
No.
I suppose that's why you've looked at me the way you have, huh?
Danced with me the way you did and kissed me the way you did.
Why your hand has always found mine and mine has always found yours...
...whenever they were anywhere near each other.
Oh, don't be a sucker.
Naturally, you're a good-looking man and I'm only human, but...
...everything you said about the State not caring or my staying here...
...or how I'd be when we were together is the bunk.
You've gotta remember how hard you worked to get where you are...
...and how you drove a truck after school and did the chores and--
My mother has been talking to you, hasn't she?
Why shouldn't she? She's got something to be proud of.
And you've gotta be proud and think about it, too...
...instead of telling people to jump bail and--
You know perfectly well that we're--
Don't be unfair.
I love you, Lee.
It'll be awfully hard to lose you.
- You know what I wish? - No.
I wish the case was over and you'd been acquitted.
- Then you shouldn't have had it postponed. - That's true.
If I hadn't, I wouldn't have met you.
That's true.
So the case is over and you've been acquitted.
Knock wood.
- And I pull out a marriage license... - Oh, gee.
...and we march right into the judge's chambers and have him marry us.
You know you're talking like a four-year-old, don't you?
You know where we're going for our honeymoon?
- Where? - Niagara Falls.
But we're there now, darling.
- You're crazy, Jack. - Well, I thought it was all settled.
That was in Niagara Falls.
People aren't responsible for what they say in Niagara Falls.
This is New York. This is today and...
...this is different.
As my aunt Emmy would say: 'Fiddlesticks'.
Well, it isn't fiddlesticks.
In the first place, there's no reason why they should acquit me and...
...even if they did, I wouldn't marry you.
Don't you love me anymore?
I never loved you.
- Were you just toying with me? - Oh, shut up.
You'll have to develop more courtesy and respect for your future husband...
...or I'll actually have to resort to strong measures.
'A woman, a dog, a hickory tree, The better you beat 'em, the better they be.'
Oh, quit it, will ya?
All right. What?
You know it isn't right, Jack.
Can't you see the papers? 'District Attorney Marries Girl Crook'.
I'd only hurt you.
Don't you remember how the judge acted when he saw us in that place?
Well, but you won't be a crook, you'll be acquitted.
- How do you know? - Well, I don't know, but...
... I think we've got a good chance.
You wouldn't do anything to make them acquit me, would you?
What could I do?
That would be a fine thing!
Driver, stop on the next corner, will ya, a minute?
We'd better not get out together. That'd be pushing things too far.
- Good luck, honey. - Thanks.
- Don't be unhappy. - I'm not unhappy, I'm...
...all confused.
Everything's gonna come out all right.
It's gotta come out all right.
Let me out in the middle of the block, will you?
I tell you, I did see them.
Dancing in a café, two hours after he was prosecuting her in this very court.
And I tell you, you're mistaken. That boy's dead on the level.
And if he weren't quite as honest as he is, I'd say he had a big future in politics.
- Why, I stood as close to them as-- - You forget that you're an old man.
Your eyes aren't as good as they used to be.
As it happens, I spoke to him and he answered me.
Well, anybody would answer you. That's only common politeness.
- I called him Jack. - There are millions of people called Jack.
You haven't got a leg to stand on. You're trying to make a case against this boy!
All ready, Your Honor.
Be right in.
So now I suppose you think he's gonna throw the case?
Those are your words, Henry, not mine.
I tell you, he wouldn't throw a case if he were trying his own brother!
Not if you were in court, he wouldn't.
- All right, then, I'll listen from here. - That's all I wanted.
- That and your apology later. - You'll get that in a pig's eye.
Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye!
The Court of General Sessions, Division of the Supreme Court of New York County...
...is now in session. His Honor, Judge Walker, presiding.
You heard Dr. Keinmetz describe the condition known as...
- ...hypnoleptic catalepsy? - Yes, sir.
Would you say that is the condition you were in?
I guess so. Yes, sir.
That's all.
Just a moment, please, Ms. Leander.
Now...
You said you were hypnotized when you left the jewelry store and walked up 5th Avenue.
Didn't you?
- Well... - Did you, or didn't you?
- Well, my lawyer said so. - Your lawyer said so?
Are we to understand then that you and your...
...lawyer do not agree exactly as to what happened?
Don't answer that question!
I object, Your Honor.
The question is highly improper, irrelevant, immaterial...
...and I ask it be stricken from the record.
Sustained. The jury will disregard the question.
Were you hypnotized, or weren't you?
- Well, I suppose-- - We don't want your suppositions.
We want to know whether you were hypnotized or not.
- Yes. - Yes, what?
- I guess I was hypnotized. - You guess you were hypnotized?
First you suppose you were hypnotized and now you guess you were.
Kindly remember you're under oath, Ms. Leander. Do you know the penalty for perjury?
- I object, Your Honor. - Sustained.
Not so rough, Jack.
How many times have I told you, when you're working with a woman--
Well, what's it? A guess or a supposition?
- What's he getting so tough about? - He's just naturally mean.
I sat on a murder case, and they didn't get that rough.
Your Honor, these jurors are gabbing again.
The jurors will cease whispering and give their entire attention to the case at hand.
- Proceed. - Ms. Leander...
Will you kindly tell us how it feels to be... hypnotized?
- I object! - Sustained.
How old were you when you began to steal things?
- I object! - Sustained.
- What's that got to do with this? - Just trying to get her in wrong.
Your Honor, those jurors are at it again.
Mr. Sargent. I am perfectly capable of running this courtroom...
...without prompting from counsel.
If there's any more whispering among the jurors, I'll hold the offenders in contempt.
Now proceed with this case.
How many times have you been hypnotized by beautiful jewelry?
- I object! - I guess quite a lot of times.
Please don't answer questions after I've objected to them.
Objection sustained. The jury will disregard the question and the answer.
Did you hear Dr. Keinmetz' opinion about hypnotism?
Will you kindly answer my question and not keep us waiting here all day?
Will you answer my question?
Your Honor, if the witness refuses to answer my questions...
...there's nothing more I can do.
Prisoner will please answer counsel's question?
- May I lend you my handkerchief? - Your Honor--
And kindly address your answers to me over here.
- Your Honor, I won't plead-- - Your Honor...
...I don't believe this young lady is well. I think a five-minute recess would be...
- But I want to be guilty! -...sufficient for her recovery.
- I'm undoubtedly responsible for having-- - Please, Jack.
Your Honor!
I just wanna plead guilty!
If Your Honor would kindly grant a five-minute recess...
My child, why do you want to plead guilty?
Because I am guilty.
And when you make a mistake, you've got to pay for it.
Otherwise you never learn.
Your Honor, it must be apparent this is not normal conduct.
Quite apparent, and the State has no wish to take advantage...
-...of a temporary aberration, a stupid-- - There's nothing temporary about this.
You can see that I'm in my right mind, can you?
Well, in that case, there's nothing more to be said.
The Court at this time will...
...set next Friday, January 6th, 10 a.m. as time for passing sentence.
Prisoner is remanded to the city jail.
Thank you, Your Honor.
Jury is dismissed.
Well?
I don't know.
Wait up!
Do you know what you've done?
Do you realize it can't be undone?
You understand there's no appeal? No retrial, no mistrial? Nothing but jail?
- How long will I get? - How do I know?
Maybe you won't get very long...
...but if you'd kept your trap shut, you wouldn't have to go at all.
There wasn't anything else to do.
Don't you see?
You're so strong, and you argue so well, and I--
I love you so much.
You certainly proved that.
I'd always do what you wanted, even if it wasn't good for you.
I'd never have a chance against you, and you'd never have a chance with me.
Like... like just now when you were trying to lose the case.
- Aren't you ashamed? - Oh, hogwash.
Oh, I know what you were trying to do.
Save little Willie's career from the bad, bad woman.
You poor sap! Don't you think I'm the best judge of what's good for me...
...and what I want most in this world?
No.
And when you were making your grand gesture...
...did you stop to think how much you were hurting me?
Do you think I'm gonna stop loving you just because they...
...lock you up with a bunch of hikers and hopheads for a few years?
- I'm not much better. - You're good enough for me.
Will you...
...come and see me sometime?
Come and see you?
I'm going to send for the judge and marry you right now.
Oh...
But...
...thank you just the same.
If you still wanted me afterwards...
...I'd be all square.
And you would've had plenty of time to think things over.
Lots of things.
Will you--
Will you stand beside me and...
...hold my hand when they sentence me?
Of course I will.
I won't be afraid.
I love you so.